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Many introverts like myself face daily bullying from friends, associates, pastors, bloggers, motivational speakers etc. Today alone, I have seen two Christian leaders write- “since you stay indoors all day, how will you get a husband”. I believe this post on Introverts & Networking will help every introvert out there.

First, since NETWORKING is a computer term, let’s start from there. Networking refers to a group of computers connected to a single server. If extroverts are networking computers, then, an introvert is a server to which others are connected. A server is the rally point of other networking computers.

In a cyber cafe, other systems are readily accessible to the public but the server is kept in a corner with a cooling fan and an expert seated by it. If the server is down, all the networking computers would be stranded.

I know that as an introvert, you are concerned about your nature. You wish you could jump on people and every association like that extrovert friend of yours even though their behaviour irks you at times. Instead of that, why don’t you just be a SERVER?

Your nature allows you to be calm, cool and collected. You have an interest in reading, brainstorming, thinking, writing, poetry, research and a host of artistic and creative works. Why not pursue being a good rally point (server)?

First. ADD value to yourself and spread that aroma of value around you. People would come.

I was not the most popular student in my class but I was the most prominent when it comes to exams. It is not a mistake that I read about 1,500-page book in a few days or that my team and I published up to 30 books in 2021 and 31 books in 2022. It was my introvertism that allows it. We can decide to write 20 more before this year ends. Everyone on the team is an introvert. We have the focus an extrovert doesn’t have.

I am not outgoing so, I can conserve my time. People see what I have to offer and rally around me. All I did was channel my “aloneliness” to productivity and not Korean movies.


whenever people come bullying you for being an indoor person, and it gets into you, you may want to ask yourself again: “why do I need more friends?”

Pastors would say- “you stay indoors all day, how will you get a husband?” I remember a mother once called me to talk to her daughter to start going out. She wanted her to change job by all means because she also works from home.

I told the sister: “your mum wanted you going out to work in hope that you would at least see a man”. If she had to go out because of one man, I believe she could as well meet that man “without going out”. In short, she is happily married today. And she didn’t change her job.

A young pastor jump on all friendships in search of connections and platforms to minister. That was his vision. As for me, my goal & focus is to make impart. I don’t need connections with the big names to impart people. So, I created a WhatsApp group and stayed consistently ministering there. Today, we run 246 groups with thousands of active members weekly. You can tell if channelling the energy in my nature pays.

There are men who struggled to send their children to an expensive school all in search of association with the children of the rich. It worked for some, but it didn’t work for some.

So, you really have to re-examine the reasons you want more associations and friendships. Check if it runs with your VALUES or not.

My mother-in-law told my wife to attend parties so she could have people come to her wedding ceremony. Well, maybe it worked for my mother-in-law but my wife didn’t need such to make people attend her wedding. She only invested in her VALUES and people came.

THIRD, Be where you ought to be

I know you feel good at being at home but there are places you really have to be, go there. Go to that service, that fellowship meeting, that seminar, that summit. It doesn’t matter if you leave as soon as the grace is shared especially when you dont have something picking after the programme.

Meanwhile, join that unit. Volunteer for that committee. Be at that surprise birthday of a good associate. You shouldn’t miss that close-call wedding party. You know you can make out time for that important person, be there. And Yes, you will meet people there. It will improve your social skills and boost your self-esteem. I know you’re not trying to look for a wife or seek attention. You’re just giving voice to every of your potential by volunteering and living your life to the fullest.

FOURTH, first impression, they say lasts longer.

Wear a good smile even though you won’t talk much. You don’t like ‘notice me’ but if you find yourself talking to a stranger, be friendly. Leave that lasting impression on people even though you won’t meet them again.

The other time, I was ministering at a place, and Pastor Damsam found me chatting with the song minister. He asked if I knew him anywhere before then. I told him- “that is sanguine for you”. They are wonderful people. He nearly asked for my house address. And I did respond well to him.

Also, attempt to be the first to say Hello to people your mind agrees with. It does feel good. Give it a try. You don’t have to act it, just be natural. You are good enough to hold a short friendly conversation, isn’t it?

Number Five. Quality VS Quantity Friendship

There is an adage- “those who have a lot of baggage also have a lot of dirt”. The truth is that most sanguines have quantity association as opposed to quality association. As an introvert, since you don’t have the energy to keep up with a lot of friends, a few quality friendship is all you need. I can tell of a lot of people who had offered to collect my contact but never called me and I never called. Left to me, I won’t collect a contact I won’t need.

I keep only two kinds of friends- those that need me and those that I need. Those that need me should pay the price of following me up. The day I didn’t see a good follower who has been following me up, I’ll look for them.

If I need a person, it means there must be a connecting factor- school, work, projects, tasks etc. It may be for a period of time or at regular intervals. And in rare cases, almost a lifetime. Once the link is off, we keep a safe distance. What do I mean? I had a good friend at school. He was good in courses which I was not. But from the time we graduated, we weren’t as close again. Why not? No task is binding us. If I have close minister friends but as we grow, our values change, we may not be as close as before but maintain a safe distance. Why? “Values have changed”.


There is no one I was ever a friend to or relate with that I can’t call up at any moment for a need or whatever. They can do the same with me. If any of such persons call me by Christmas, I will talk to them very cheerfully even though we may not talk again until the next Christmas but that few minutes on phone would be hearty. If they need me, I do be there for them in my capacity.

I remember my very good friend at school. When I needed an editor, I called him. He spent almost a week at my house. There was a contract and I felt he was the best man, so I called him. We don’t need to be kicking all over the place like kids. Some enjoy that, but I don’t. Whenever needs prop up, we can always hook up.


– Many keep friends for ‘we don’t know what we may need who for’. That’s an excuse for wasting your time and other people’s time.

I tell you what rather, invest that time:
*If you ADD value to your life.
*If you are nice and friendly to every stranger you meet even if it’s only once you ever met.
*If you exit relationships on a good note.
*If you ever need a person or a thing badly and God is with you, you will get it.

Disclaimer- this post was not aimed at talking down on extroverts and sanguines. You guys are wonderful people. You are the honey of this world. Bring out the positive part of your emotions and dump the negatives.


Christian LEADERSHIP 1 – Pst. Ife ADETONA

Mandate Month
December is our mandate night!
so, our Bible Study shall focus on LEADERSHIP.
The mandate of leadership is for us to fulfil our Destiny!
So, we shall be discussing CHRISTIAN LEADERSHIP
Eternal Lord, we worship your name! We give you praise for always stocking us with His word of life.

1.Early exposure to supervision

We look unto you tonight for a great filling in Jesus’ Name
Let us pray
And the things that thou hast heard of me among many witnesses, the same commit thou to faithful men, who shall be able to teach others also. 2 Timothy 2:2

every believer is handed the baton of leadership!
Mummy was showing the post of one of our leaders who said SADOZ was the first place she stood before people to speak
Christianity is a great point for leadership.

It is a great training point for leadership roles in society.
History and even what is happening in our contemporary days have shown us that Christian ministries at large have allowed so many to experiment with their leadership ability by giving them roles to play.
In the children’s department of the church, for instance, we have a choir leader who is a child.
And ever since, her life has changed!
As a believer grows, there are several units where he can serve.
There you will also find a Sunday school teacher who is likely a teenager.
They are consciously being trained for leadership every time they prepare for their anniversary.
After leaving the NCCF, he returns to the adult church.
A child who grows up in a children’s church will be transferred to the teenager’s church or department and from there to the youth church and from there to the campus fellowship and then to the National Christian Corpers Fellowship (NCCF).
Many are also exposed to Christian leadership in interdenominational ministries like SADOZ.
All through those stages, he comes across opportunities to serve as a leader.
All these help to reveal and develop the leadership capacity in man.
Many wouldn’t have gotten any leadership exposure early in life if not for churches and Christian ministries.
Many people like me had their first leadership experience in Christianity.
And before you can get a job where you will demonstrate your leadership potential, you must have grown into your early adulthood.
Community and political leadership are so skewed that believers shy away from them.
Christian ministries bridge this gap and present an unending leadership adventure for as many as desire it.
It was required, according to the law of the Old Testament, that Levites should be initiated into leadership from the age of 20.
As we see in the examples of the Levites,
Early exposure to leadership was part of the basic and foundational vision of Christianity.


These were the sons of Levi after the house of their fathers; even the chief of the fathers, as they were counted by na number of names by their polls, that did the work for the service of the house of the Lord, from the age of twenty years and upward. 1 Chronicle 23:24

Christian ministries are seen as non-profit-making organizations.
Another major benefit that Christian leadership gives is that it builds selflessness in men.
It produces a selfless leader, which is the scarcest form of leadership.
Only a few people would work sacrificially in a place where a monetary gift is not attached.
When you work there, you are not expected to be paid. You are required to spend your money and time.
If a man would serve selflessly and sacrificially in a place where he is not being paid, how much would he do where he is being paid?
I remember after I left the campus, I was given a job at a ministry
And we have seen a lot of such men in Christianity.
When I saw the job, I was leaping
I said to myself, it’s as if you asked me to come and do what I used to for free and you will pay me for doing so!
They said they would be paying me
a part for free and a part for the money
I promised myself to work DOUBLE!
He just got the new job
He said: “daddy, is just like Anagkazo and they will be paying us”
A Sadozite told me about his experience at his present place of work.
Calling them to get their orders and delivering it
He is working with a firm and he is into customer relations
He said they had been told that the work was tedious but he was surprised to see that it was nothing.
He said that his boss is amazed at how he works
That is what Christian Leadership does in you
I am convinced that any man who expresses zeal in working for God selflessly would be the best employee in his office and wherever he finds himself.

In the same vein, anyone that fails in Christian service cannot be fit for any other leadership capacity.
Among them, I can accurately predict the ones who would succeed in any role they are assigned and the ones that may fail.
This is a tested and trusted fact.
There are over a thousand young adults who have passed through and are still in the leadership of our ministry.
Jesus said it:
He that is faithful in that which is least is faithful also in much: and he that is unjust in the least is unjust also in much- *Luke 16:10.*
It is not because of anything, in particular, it is simply the law of nature.
Anyone who is not faithful in little things will surely mess up complex things. Jesus said it:
I mentioned earlier that the scarcest form of leadership is selfless leadership.
Anyone who fails the test of selflessness cannot oversee the lives of fellow men

3. Spiritual Build-up

Christian leadership helps our spirituality.
Technology, social media influence, modernization, globalization and many more have diverted the attention of man from his spiritual status.
Take it or leave it. Man is first a spiritual being before he becomes a natural being, and it is the spiritual that controls the physical.
Many factors around us today have downplayed the spirituality of man.
A man is a spirit that has a soul and lives in a body, but our educational system emphasizes more on soul-building
and our environment emphasizes body beautification, paying no attention to the spiritual aspect of man.
When a man is right spiritually, everything about him becomes right.
For to be carnally minded [is] death; but to be spiritually minded [is] life and peace. Romans 8:6.

It is only Christian leadership and Christian education that emphasizes the spirituality of man.
Many suicides, depression and hypertension issues that have become prevalent today are because of the refusal to labour on the building up of the spirit of man.
Even great, mighty and wealthy people in the world still commit suicide. Many of them lived on antidepressants.
It is only Christianity that works on building a man’s spirituality, which is why, as a believer; you dare not play down on being involved in Christian leadership.
That is because they have stamina in their body and soul, but they are very weak in their spirit.
A merry heart doeth good [like] a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones. Proverbs 17:22.
He is a Christian leader. He remains a Sunday school teacher in his church even when he was a busy surgeon, well sought after all around
The great neurosurgeon Benjamin Solomon Carson emphasized that he is everything he is by the grace of God.
His spirituality aided his success in his career as well as in life.
Quiet time is a disciplined routine. We live in a world of spontaneity.

4. Christian leadership teaches discipline.

One of the habits of a Christian leader is what we call quiet time.
We believe in doing things spontaneously, but great leaders will tell you their routine, and schedule, and also tell you things that they have disciplined themselves to be accustomed to.
A Christian leader is known for fasting, which is denying oneself food for a period.
These are acts of discipline that are only taught by Christian leadership.
A trained Christian leader can delay gratification.
A Christian leader prays regularly and practices given.
Here, Paul was telling his son, Timothy, to endure hardness, not a hardship.
They are things that make a man morally sound and fit for leadership positions.

Tho, therefore,e endure hardness as a good soldier of Jesus Christ.
2 Timothy 2:3

In another part of the Bible, Christian leaders are described as athletes running a race.
Hardness is training. A Christian leader is seen as a soldier and you know the discipline a man goes through to become a soldier.
One of the most disciplined people on earth is an athlete.
Christianity is the breeding ground for influential leaders. Christianity builds all these virtues in us consciously and unconsciously.
Prominent leaders in America, Europe and Africa all came from the church and Christianity.
We should not be too busy in our career to be Christian leaders because it is in doing so that you can emerge as genuine leaders. Praise God!
We should stop here so you can download it for your students
Tell me, are you blessed tonight?


Has Pastor Ife been a blessing to you in one way or the other?

Has He touched your life in a way or the other?

If Yes, Spare one minute and Write a THANK YOU MESSAGE to him via this link https://gdpd.xyz/damsam123 NOW!!!

You may include your name or hide it.


My Child, as you go out into the larger Christian world, you will constantly hear discussions surrounding the subject of “the law”. You have read a lot about it in your New Testament Bible also but I supposed you may not fully understand why it’s so much a big deal. I will be giving you background guidance that will lead you as you come across this debate.

When you hear the word ” the law”. It could actually refer to many things. It could mean, “the whole of the Old Testament”. In case you don’t know, some people have stopped reading the Old Testament because they feel Jesus had ditched all that is in it. That is extreme anyway.

“The Law” could also refer to the five Books of Moses. You know them, right? The Law could mean all the “do’s and don’ts” of the Old Testament. Also, The Law could mean just “the Ten Commandments”.

When they say the death and resurrection of our Lord Jesus have ended the law, you may want to ask- “which law are you talking about?” For instance, the fifth law of the Ten Commandments says- “honour thy father and thy mother”. Has Jesus ended that law? Can we now dishonour our parents? That is the reason I want to tell you about the “Justification Law”. Have you heard that before? As you go on, you may hear other terms like “Moral laws”, ” Agricultural Laws”, “Ceremonial Laws” and so on. These are sections of the law that deal with an aspect of life and conduct.

There is an aspect of the law called “the Justification Law”. A major reason Jesus died on the cross was actually to put an end to the justification law. This law has nothing to do with “Dos and don’ts”. Adam has committed enough sin to send every man to hell. And the judgement had already been pronounced. But to absolve man from that eternal death, God propounded the justification law. The first part id this law didn’t even start with Moses but with Abraham. And that is “CIRCUMCISION”.

Circumcision is the major justification law. That’s why several discourse and argument about the law in the Bible and most especially in the book of Romans is all about “circumcision”. It was a big issue in the New Testament. Some of the early believers couldn’t wrap their heads around the fact that someone can be called a child of God without being circumcised. Let me surprise you- Paul had to circumcise his disciple, Titus just so that they could let the young man be.

The second part of the justification law didn’t even start with Abraham or Moses, it started with Adam. God introduced it to Adam by directly engaging in the first act. And that is “shedding the blood of animals for the cleansing of human sins”. You remember that God clothed Adam and his wife with the skin of an animal (Genesis 3:21). God won’t get that skin except if an animal was killed. And we don’t see proof that God sun-dry the skin of the animal before putting it on them. They were covered with the blood of an animal (likely a lamb) for the covering of their nakedness (sin).

In essence, you can say that there are two main “Justification Law”. Circumcision and cleansing with animal blood.

Those two things are major things Jesus came for. He replaced Himself with the lamb that is being slaughtered. And when we believe in Him, we are circumcised in our hearts as against the cutting of the flesh. That is why the Apostles kept saying that- “we are justified by faith and not by law (circumcision and killing of animals)”. The Bible also keep saying- ” the just shall live by his faith”. That is, the justified shall keep on living by believing in the works of Christ.

So, what happens to other aspects of the law most especially the Ten Commandments? And other “Righteous Living Laws”???

Let me start by telling you that the Ten Commandments didn’t actually start with Moses. They used to be to oral laws passed down orally but became written laws in the days of Moses. They were institutionalized or constitutionalized by Moses. For instance, Joseph lived years before Moses was born, he refused to commit adultery by saying “I do not want to sin against God”. So, it has always been a sin to commit adultery. Cain who lived centuries before Moses killed his brother and he was sentenced because of it. Also, you remember that the tenth law says ” thou shall not covet your neighbour’s wife”. The wives of the King that took the wife of Abraham were rendered barren until he was forgiven.

Back to your question – what Jesus did with the ten commandments and other righteous living commandments of God are two things: “He gives us the grace (strength) to obey them easily. He also grants us immediate forgiveness if we err as against the killings of animals to beg for forgiveness.

Jesus also didn’t end tithing because it is not a justification law. In fact, tithing started with Abraham and not with Moses. Like the righteous living laws, Jesus gives us the grace to sow our tithes with joy and guarantees us the blessings thereof.

Ife Adetona


I was driving towards Ojoo on Friday at about 7:30 pm when I saw this light-skinned young man, stark naked appeared in front of my vehicle!

“Is this a fresh mad person?” That was the first thought that flashed through my mind.

At the same time, I was hearing voices behind me- “o se ise ni”. That is, “he’s doing a wealth ritual”.

“I said it, this boy is not mad. He’s only forming madness with whatever he was chewing in his mouth.”

Abi, this is one of the Yahoo boys that do all sorts of nonsense as instructed by their Nollywood Babalawo? I have seen some bathing by a river in broad daylight on the roadside not too far from Agodi Gardens. Some time ago, some guys were videoed eating their poo. The video was posted on social media.

At first, I wanted to do just one thing, scare him out of the road. I moved the vehicle closer. He stood still- “like common on, hit me”. Ha! What is this? I decided to move away from him towards the left- he followed!

Those speaking behind me threw something at him. It sounds like sand and stone because it hit the side of the vehicle.

“Abi this guys want to snatch the car ni”. “Is it some kind of collaboration?”

That part of the road is a bend, just when you are about to reach Ojoo. It is usually dark and lonely with trailers parked on the right side of the road.

They rushed into the road to chase him off. He turned his back and took off. I moved the car forward. Before I could say jack. Those guys have left the road in fear of being knocked down and this boy was back facing my car.

A minute just before I got there, I was just thanking God for helping me drive through the massive potholes of Iwo Road- Ojoo express successfully. A voice had told me that my thanksgiving was too early and that I should wait till I reach Ojoo first. I replied that as far as I am concerned, I had already arrived safely. People were waiting for me at Ojoo. The plan was to drive the members of the SADOZ MASS Choir to the Great Zion City in Ijaiye for their rehearsals in preparation for the Leaders’ Fire Conference.

With this naked guy facing me the second time, the Holy Spirit said to me: dribble him. Jay-Jay Okocha’s leg over quickly came to mind. Little football is still in the blood. For God knows why “no car approached around all through that time”.

Okay, let’s do this. I swerved LEFT as if I was driving that way, he followed and then, I cut RIGHT and zoomed off. “OLUWASEUN, MO BO- Thank God, I AM FREE.

I can’t explain how I was calm all through the period. It must have been God. I wasn’t jittery or shaky. Though, it still look like a movie in my eye.

I think the various law enforcement agencies need to do better in their way of handling the so called young ritualists paraded as “yahoo boys”. Police and EFCC should stop treating them like their Maga. The other time policemen nabbed two supposed yahoo boys in a commercial bus I was in Iseyin, they were smiling all over and blushing as if they just hit a jackpot. They should stop extorting money from them and stop encouraging them by sending them back to the society to make more money. Rather, they should be properly prosecuted in the law court and send to the prison when found guilty.

These boys have also being reported of been into ritual killings and dumping ladies by the roadside after taking away their senses. These things will be on the rise as their number grows. It has to be stopped.

A to Z of COURTSHIP – MotherTreasure

Father, we thank you for the grace we received to be here tonight.

We say; Thank you, Jesus.

Sweet Holy Spirit, I ask that you speak to each person tonight in Jesus’ name.

Have your way and let Jesus alone be Glorified.

In Jesus’ name, we’ve prayed


A-Z does not mean the totality of Courtship, but by the time we look into every points under this topic, add God’s Grace and you are good to go,
Because you will have a hitch free relationship and would have build something that will result into a lasting marriage
Hold the points I will be giving you tonight dear to your heart and practice them, your relationship and marriage is surely a success
You must be accountable to each other

1. Accountability

There is no relationship or marriage that can survive without being accountable to each other
There is a way your behavior is controlled if you know you are accountable to someone
You won’t behave anyhow
You won’t relate with the opposite sex anyhow
You won’t live your life carelessness
You won’t do whatever you know will hurt the order person if they get to know
You must be accountable to each other and it must be always

2. Boundaries

Anything and everything that will be successful must be run with principle
If you don’t set boundaries your relationship will be full of sin
To have a holy and pure relationship you must set boundaries
Healthy boundaries for yourselves
Won’t they call me an SU or and old school
I used to say that even if shaking of hands is going to put you in trouble, avoid it, don’t destroy your life with what people will say
Your life is your life, whatever you do with it will come back to you at the end of the day
Still on Boundaries
Or encourage that a lady you have not married is sleeping with you
Don’t say I don’t get unnecessarily arouse and carry your bag to go n be living in a man’s house
Set Boundaries with the third party
This falls the the male’s side more
If you don’t set boundaries with your friends and family, your wife or wife to be is not going to enjoy you
If your friend can talk to your spouse anyhow
You must be able to draw the line of how far they can go with your partner
Your family can humiliate her there will be problem
No one should be allowed to talk to your spouse anyhow because of whatever position they occupy in your life
You can decide to do away with the lady instead of torturing her with what your family think or want
Ladies pls don’t go and marry someone that his family hates you by fire by fire, don’t start what you can’t finish
You must stand for her

3. Communication

You won’t be able to tolerate insults and abuse for the rest of your life
Any relationship without communication has ended when it is barely starting
You can’t even do any relationship whatsoever without communication
You must always talk
What of me that doesn’t like to talk, you might have to check thoroughly if you are not with the wrong person
There is no one with a partner they love, someone that doesn’t shout them down, someone that listen to them and do not want to talk
You might not be the type that talk everywhere or at any giving opportunity but there will always be one person that knows everything going on with you because you always find it easy to open up to them
Between you two there must not be anything you can’t talk about as long as you are not sinning against God
You must be able to talk about everything and anything
They are not discussing important issues
Now, some people do talk but are just spilling rubbing out of their mouth because they are just talking for talking sake
Some of you will be on phone and the only thing you will do successfully in 2hours conversation is to giggle, smile, blush, ask if your partner have eaten or hungry
You come together face to face only to talk about things that are irrelevant to your lives☹️
Have seen married asked me questions and I wonder what they were talking about in Courtship🤷🏽‍♀️
Talk about everything
Don’t fantasize, base your discussions on fact
N don’t forget to know what your partner’s stand is on any matter you talk about
Know their stand, ask yourself if you are comfortable with it, and decide whether you have reached your destination or not
Also communication silence conflict as much as possible

4. Deliberate

It will help you resolve issues easily
But it is not all the time you communication you should deliberate
Normally communication should carry deliberation
Sometimes you just inform your partner
Because what you are discussing does not call for deliberation
Stuffs like deciding on the number of kids you are going to have takesdeliberation
Don’t assume you will cross the bridge when you get there
Don’t just sit there and be looking like lucozade especially if you have a contrary opinion
How you will run your future home in every aspect deserves deliberation

5. Encouragement

You not in that relationship as a figure head
When your partner is down you should encourage them
You are not there just to be there
Challenge or no challenge, issue or no issue you should always encourage each other to do better
When they are going through a difficult time they should know that they are not alone
Encourage each other to progress
Encourage each other to become the better version of what you used to be
Relationship is the headquarters of offence

6. Forgiveness

Or let’s say Romantic Relationship is the headquarters of offence
You will always offend each other but must be ready to forgive
As long as what they do is not going to destroy your future
Forgive and move on
If there is a particular error they seems so addicted to and they can’t but do it and you know you can’t live with it, forgive them and move on with your life
That you should forgive does not implies that you marry rubbish
It is well with us in Jesus name

7.Good Character

If your character stinks, stop looking for someone that will tolerate and accept you the way you are
Be sincere to yourself that you have bad character and change
It is simple
Don’t say that is me o
If you can’t take me for me forget it
My dear, who are you🌚
You better change
Be kind
Be compassionate
Work on your anger
Work on your weaknesses
Nobody is perfect but you shouldn’t be wallowing in bad behavior


Making anything successful out of Courtship or marriage is hardwork
You must be deliberate in making it work
You must work hard in your field to, and make something meaningful out of life
Working hard and smart makes life easy for you, your spouse and your children
It is easy to show plenty love when there is money compare when there is no money
It is easy to love when there is money than when there is no money


Show interest in what interest them
What do they love to do? Show interest in it, so far they are not sinning against God
If you don’t see yourself liking what they like for anything in this world, just know that you are with the wrong person
And if you go ahead and marry them, expect a lot of friction concerning that thing in future
When you show interest in what interest them they show more interest in you


With Wisdom a house is built,
And you know wisdom is the application of knowledge
Which means if you don’t equip yourself with knowledge you will not be categorize as one with Wisdom
You will not be able to build a lasting home
You will not be able to build a home that can stand the test of storms and challenges
Many of you does not know how to get God’s will, you passed by my book You can’t pay the price of missing God’s will and Finding God’s will” but show no interest🤷🏽‍♀️
Get books
How will somebody not miss it like that
You don’t know a thing and you refuse to go after knowledge🌚
Get books
Many people have run this race successfully and have come back to show you the way, pls follow them and stop doing Awnnn and God when all over sociol media

11. Love

What are you doing with someone you don’t love🌚
Only to force yourself into marriage and be regretting
There is no reason no matter how reasonable it sounds that should make you marry someone that you don’t love
Another thing about love is that,
Love is an action word
Love is to be acted out
If you say to someone that you love them, they won’t be convinced except your actions in the past says the same thing
You must love in doings not by mouth

12. Openness

If you are secretive, i don’t advise you go into Courtship talk more of marriage
You must be open
I didn’t say open your legs🌚
Open your mouth and talk, let them know what is going on with you
Let them know what is going on in your life
Anything you won’t want them to know don’t engage in it
Don’t forget prayer in all you do

13. Prayer, Planning, Patient &Progress

To communicate and deliberate is good but don’t forget to put your life and journey in God’s hand
Don’t forget to thank Him
N don’t because of relationship sweetness forget that you are to intercede and supplicate
Now is the time to start planning your life together
Plan for the present and the future together
Any Relationship without plans will be full of uncertainty
Be patient with each other
It won’t go once, but be sure they are making progress
Give yourselves time to work on your weaknesses
Also your relationship as a whole must be progressive
Go from one stage to another
What progress is in relationship that takes forever to get married
That is why I usually say go into Courtship when marriage is in view


Respect your partner’s opinion even if you won’t use their contribution at the end of the day don’t just discard it like its useless
Respect each others

15. Sincerity and selflessness

If you are selfish, no relationship whatsoever is for you
You must be selfless
You must have your partner in mind
You must priorities their need as long as they are not asking you to sin against God
In fact you must put them first
What if their need is not something I can priorities, it is the pointer that you are with the wrong person
SincerityDon’t lie to them for whatever ret
SincerityDon’t lie to them for whatever reason, let them know what is going on with you
Tell them nothing but the truth
Don’t call black, white
Be straight forward
And that is when they can truly trust you
You must be transparent, sincere to be trusted

16. Transparency breeds Trust

Trust doesn’t fall on people like rain
You can’t say, why can’t you trust me
You are the one to put yourself in a place to be trusted


That is what understanding simply means
You must bear with each other
Be empathic
Put yourself in their shoeCourtship is not marriage, but the foundation for marriage, but don’t forget that if you don’t lay a solid foundation, the build you are about to raise will collapse when you are barely starting


I am not on Twitter because of CT- Christian Twitter. I am there for political and socio-economic discourse- all of which I just read and pass quietly. But as it goes, my posts on Facebook find their way there.

Most arguments and errors in Christendom are LANGUAGE BASED. Some err because of language. And some misconceived what others say because of language. A student of language will easily spot this.

A believer sang a song “Daddy wey dey pamper”.
Someone criticized that statement saying God doesn’t pamper. People came out at him. They said he criticized the singer. He said, he has never listened to that song let alone target the singer but the phrase was what he felt should be corrected.

This matter never reach to poke each others’ eye. The same me that says my daddy spoilt me as I reflect and isolate his caring side, can come again and say my father is a colonel while I zoom out his disciplinary side. A wife can talk about her caring husband so much that you would be like: ” is your husband a fool”. Wait for the day she would talk about how her husband dealt decisively with an issue and you would almost fear for her.

You can argue that God is not a staunch disciplinarian and be right. You can also argue that He doesn’t over care and be right as well. But LANGUAGE permits me to go that length of emphasizing an aspect of Him to drive out a point per time.

A man of God preached a message titled: “SINNERS IN THE HAND OF AN ANGRY GOD”. That message is ranked one of the greatest messages ever preached. But I can never preach a message with that title. I would rather preach: ” SINNERS IN THE HAND OF A LOVING GOD”. People listened to that man’s message and wept for days and committed their hearts to God. If you listen to mine, you will laugh, smile, rejoice and commit your heart to God as well.

You can argue from now till tomorrow, none of us is wrong with our title. It’s just a side of God that we have zoomed out to show to sinners with the end result of bringing them to the THRONE.


There are some misconceptions I noticed in the body of Christ today, it is all about the “fruit of the Spirit.”
I’ve been to some gatherings whereby I will ask the question that “how many fruit of the spirit do we have?” Some will say nine (9), while some will say seven (7.)
I’m putting up this article to correct that error.

The first thing I want you to know is that, when we are talking about the fruit of the spirit, the concept emanated from the word of Jesus in the book of John 15:1-4;
[1] I am the true vine, and my Father is the husbandman.
[2] Every branch in me that beareth not fruit he taketh away: and every branch that beareth fruit, he purgeth it, that it may bring forth more fruit.
[3] Now ye are clean through the word which I have spoken unto you.
[4] Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye, except ye abide in me.

You should understand the picture Jesus was painting here. He said, “He is a tree, and in that tree, there are many branches, and the branches bring forth fruit.” Jesus said “fruit,” not “fruits.” He said, “any branch in me that bringeth not fruit, I taketh away.”

This is linked to the fruit of the Spirit that we are talking about. When Jesus was going, He made a promise to us that He was going to send another comforter and He’s going to be with us forever. This comforter is Jesus Christ Himself, Jesus is the one that is with us, living in us, and that is with us in form of the Holy Spirit.
If Jesus said that “I am the tree,” and Jesus is not on earth currently, and He gave us a replacement, a substitutionary personality that He’s going to be with us, that personality is the one that is going to represent Jesus. That is why we call it the fruit of the Spirit, not the fruit of Jesus. Maybe when Jesus was on earth, you can liken those attributes to the fruit of the world, or the fruit of Jesus, but currently, Jesus is not on earth, He is in us in form of the Holy Spirit.

When we are talking about the fruit of the Spirit, we should look at the tree, a tree does not bear different fruits. Have you ever seen a tree bearing up to seven (7) or nine (9) fruits? So, it is not fruits of the Spirit, but where the misconception used to come is what Paul told us with the inspiration of the Holy Spirit in the book of Galatians 5:22-23;
[22] But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
[23] Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.

These are what they used to call the fruits of the Spirit. But look at what Paul said, he said, “but the fruit,” he didn’t say the “fruits of the Holy Spirit,” Even if it is the fruits of the Holy Spirit, the next “marker” that should follow it should be the “plural marker.” He said that the fruit of the Spirit “is.” If it is more than one, it shouldn’t be “is,” it should be “are.” “The fruits of the Spirit are…” then we will begin to be mentioning them. But he said, “the fruit of the Spirit is…” So, we should sit down, look at this point and think about what Paul was really saying here. You’re mentioning nine (9) different attributes, you’re mentioning nine (9) different characters, and you’re telling us that it is one.

This is where I want to explain it to us, whenever you’re reading a bible, and you get to a junction whereby you’re not getting what the scripture is saying very well, what you should do is to compare different versions of the scripture. I’ve met with so many people, and they’ll tell me that they don’t understand what the bible is saying, the only answer I’ll give to them is not to explain it to them, I’ll tell them to go and read it from another version of the scripture and they’ll come back to me leaping for joy that they got the understanding already. That is what we are going to do also in other to understand what Paul is trying to say here.

Look at the book of Galatians 5:22-23 from “The Passion Translation, (TPT)
vs 22–23; But the fruit produced by the Holy Spirit within you is divine love in all its varied expressions:
Joy that overflows, peace that subdues, patience that endures, kindness in action,
a life full of virtue, faith that prevails, gentleness of heart, and strength of spirit.
Never set the law above these qualities, for they are meant to be limitless.

Paul said that the fruit that the Spirit produced is just one, which is “divine love.”
And this “divine love” can be seen in different ways. For example; I can be manifested in different forms or ways: To my mother, I am a son, to my disciples, I am their spiritual father or discipler, to my younger brother, I am an elder brother, to my child, I am a father. That is me manifesting in different forms. So is the fruit of the Spirit, it is just one, and it is manifesting itself in different forms.

I hope you understand from this article that we are only having one fruit of the Spirit.

If you’re having any questions or contributions, feel free to drop them in the comment box.
Thank you so much!


We have 💡light tonight in Jesus Name

How Successful People Think

I also say they think creatively and innovstively
I have mentioned that successful people think big no matter how low their state may be at the present moment in time
Remember that I told you they didn’t come up with this habit after being successful. They grew with the habits. These habits made them

4. Successful People like us are optimistic

Successful people are highly hopeful.
They see a positive ending and that is why they can take calculative risks.
That’s what it means to be optimistic
That’s why when you see them going down, they pick up again
They could see the end as bright and they are never down whatever it is at the moment.
Whenever they fall, they rise again.
Bishop Oyedepo explained that when their ministry had only one branch in a corner of a place, their signpost reads: worldwide.
They look at the future with big high hopes and expectations.
He said people passed by and laugh at them but he didn’t care. He didn’t see himself or the ministry in that corner.
It worked for me, it worked for our ministry. Even though we started in a room apartment, we talked big and we took bold steps!
See, Optimism is not a motivational speech but an inspirational reality.
They think problem solving thoughts.

5. Successful people see themselves as bigger than the problem.

Successful people think as problem solvers.
They don’t shy away from problems.

6. Successful peeople always takes stepsThey think as they move and move as they think.
Successful people are not thinkers and sleepers, they are thinkers and movers, as they think and they act.
If you think positively with the right mindset and not just wishes, there is no way you will stay complacent. You will always forge ahead and move ahead.


Receive this very mindset in Jesus Name.

A. Successful people value their morning time!

How do they see time?
What do they think about time?
The Scriptures says “woe to you o ye lands, who its kings eat in the morning.
The Yoruba tribe of Nigeria would say: ‘the real day is the morning time’.
The morning time is the most treasured time of the day.
The morning time carries more value than the night time.
Jesus Christ says “are there not 12 hours in the day? John 11:9”.
Take note that, The beginning of the week is the morning of the week.
Your youthful age is the morning period of your life.
I see many young men and ladies wasting away the early part of their lives.
That is why the preacher in the book of Ecclesiastes advised that man should remember his God in the days of his youth.
When you open the head of many young ladies under 30, what you see in there is “husband”.
I do say that what many youths miss before the age of 30, they will spend the rest of their lives trying to catch up with it.
They are just catching fun, nothing do them.
They want to marry. When you open the head of most boys, what you find there is “fun”.
Mark Zuckerberg became a billionaire at the age of 23. I am not saying that you must make billions or millions before you clock 30, but you must aim to be at the top of your career before that age.
Those who started their race in time have a higher tendency of winning.
Most top billionaires today, started making their several millions at the age of 30.
However, it doesn’t matter what point you are today, it is not too late to start aiming high.

B . Successful people are never in a hurry.

Have you discovered that those who get late to meetings and events are always coming in, in a hurry.
. They get to wherever they need to reach at the time they wanted or planned or ought to.
You will never see a successful person rushing or getting to a place late.
And that’s because they have good time management.
You see them running, sweating and breathing heavily yet, those who come early arrived very calmly?
What is most important to a successful person than money is their time.
They don’t permit people to crash on them and steal their time.
I think I should stop here
By the time you’re downloading it, it will be much
It’s much already
Receive the grace to apply in Jesus Name


I have said to myself that the day I remove “L” from the car, I will share some driving tips free of charge. Though, it’s been almost a month now but better late than….

When you want to start learning, people will tell you driving is very easy especially if its an automatic! You will see someone who has never driven before tell you: “shebi it is automatic, it is very simple. Our last born did not even learn it, he just started driving when he was 7½ years old!” Those who can drive already will tell you: “there is nothing in driving, it’s just about “aya nini”-having chest (i.e confidence).

If you allow those statements to get into you, the day you begin to learn, you would feel like becoming an expert so that you can tell people that you started driving from the dream. And when it seems you are not getting it, you will start feeling like a dullard.

You see that 7½ years old may be able to move a car, it is quite different from driving. And that thing they call chest (confidence) can only come the more you stay behind those steering wheel. Talking about being good at driving, time & practice is needed. I am talking about up to 6 months here. So, don’t pursue becoming an Henry Ford the same day you started.

That being said, with a regular practice, if it’s an automatic car, one week, too much. I taught my wife to drive in less than 7 days. You can spread your 7days into 2weeks or more depending on your schedule.


Get someone to teach you. Follow their instructions even if you don’t understand it. Don’t be self-confident.

Day One– go to the field, don’t go to the road. All you want to learn is to get familiar with the major driving car components- brake, throttle and most especially your steering wheel. You will also get introduced to other parts.

Day Two– warm up on the field then get to the road. Untarred road within the street are good picks here. Don’t go to major roads with human beings, parked vehicles and drainage. What you will learn to use the most that day is your BRAKE. You will start familiarising with your throttle as well. Make as many rounds as possible.

Day Three– do more rounds on the street then let your instructor take you to a tarred road but still a less busy road. This is just to spy the road. This time, you will see human beings and drainage on both side of the road. You may not do more than one round that day.

Day Four– It is time to learn your throttle. Warm up on the street then go to the tarred road you spied yesterday. Make several roads and go a long distance (within the same route).

Your instructor will tell you to keep the right side of the road and avoid getting into the middle. But you will be afraid of entering into the ditch (gutter) that’s on the right side. This fear is real! But here is the cheat code. You don’t have to stick to the right-most part of the road. Use your mind to divide the road into two and move a bit to your right- you will be okay!

Again, use your mind to cut the road into two- half for you and half for the oncoming vehicle. But you won’t be too accurate, so add a little space to your right and keep driving.

Bear in mind that the road is not always straight so, you will keep using the trick. Also, on a typical Nigeria road, you will vehicle parked on the road side, people walking and even stalls. All you have to do is to divide the road again into two, take your own half. If there is more space to your side then move a bit to your right. If the road has become very thin for two vehicles at a time, just take your own half and leave the coming vehicle to take care of itself.

Your aim on the road this 3rd day is not to DRIVE, it is just to MOVE the car and get more familiar with various components most especially the fearful throttle that will make the vehicle seems as if it’s jumping and also the brake and the pin-pin. Be ready to blast many ON. You will also start building chest (confidence) on this day.

Day Four- drive up to the same route with you instructor. Using the same environment helps. Did I tell you to put up your ” L” and emergency light all through? Please do. You must have been learning some reverses and turning too.

Reverse they say is difficult but my two students learn it the first day. You will be told to ask yourself which side you want to go then turn your steering to the opposite direction but let me show you a simpler way. Ask yourself what direction you want the bottom ⤵️ of your vehicle to go to, then turn that way. Always take all the time you have to think while reversing. You will make mistakes, correct yourself and move on.

You may enjoy driving the 3rd day but this 4th day will be a bit frustrating. Reason is that, on day 3, you were driving at a very low rate but today, you have added some speed. With speed comes higher expertise. Meanwhile, always bring the vehicle to the speed you can handle. Don’t be in a hurry to run. You will run all you want after you are good.

If I were your instructor, I will like to introduce you to the express road before we close on day four. Just to spy.

Day 5– welcome to day 5. Warm up on your tarred route then drive up to a two-way express road with barricade at the middle. This is a type of road where all oncoming vehicle take one side, while the going vehicles take another side. And there is a barricade in-between. Look for the one with barricade in-between.

Your instructor may tell you to keep the slow lane which is the right hand side but I got an instructor who told me to keep the fast lane. Reason is, driving on slow lane in Nigeria especially in Ibadan can be frustrating. Micra, Maruwa & Okada (commercial drivers) will show you shege. They will just be parking anyhow. But if you are in the fast lane, anyone who doesn’t like your speed can easily bypass.

On this day, you will be learning some speed. The safest is 20-40KM/hr. You will also appreciate the purpose of side and rear mirror. Driving on the express the first time is always interesting especially with less pot holes. It will give you the confidence which you need and you will find yourself driving better on single lane tarred routes.

Day 6- do some rounds on the two-way express then go to the express road that has no barricades in the middle. This time, keep the middle or slow lane. You will appreciate your mirror more. You should also drive through other major and minor routes that day with your instructor.

Day 7– drive the car to Church. All along, observe other people drive especially when you’re seated with them.

Now, you are a driver. What you need is more practice. What I did was to drive around the city for another one week with an instructor or just someone who didn’t even know how to drive but would be communicating road signs and routes with you. An instructor would be more beneficial because they will give you tips as you drive.

Please Note-

Some things I said especially on the roads to learn may be a traffic offence in some cities and countries. Where it is against the law and such law is enforced, apply with discretion.

Above all, I hope you found it helpful. 7 days is not too long to learn a skill you will need for the rest of your 70years and more. So, don’t be in a hurry and be safe. If you don’t yet have a car, keep this post by yourself. Don’t come and be asking me: “where is that post you wrote in September, 2022”.

©Ife Adetona